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This blog is three months into its 15 th year. Hard to believe, really. I first started this blog to provide a place to ventilate my feelings on a large array of topics. This allowed me to edit a newspaper without letting non-community issues enter the conversation. It not only worked for that purpose, but it provided an entirely new arena for my writing. In turn, my thinking has grown exponentially. Any topic is now subjected to analysis, feelings and writing. The internal conversations I have over these topics is intense and nearly constant. That reminds me, do you think in the abstract, or do you voice your thoughts in your mind?   I think I have always voiced my thinking, although I do not have a sound to the voice. I doubt I would recognize it if I heard it! Do any of you do the same thing?   I don’t recall ever having asked that question of anyone. Do tell me your experiences. Another thought, a lot has happened in the past 14 years. Just think of the advancements...

Another year ends. Tomorrow a new year starts its journey through time. Year after year this has happened and will as far as we know. And hope. This year our family sorrowed through two close deaths. Who may be on this list in 2026? Will we be challenged again by loss? Surely the odds are for this to happen. It is the storyline of life. We must prepare for the empty space, but this should teach us to honor and value our loved ones while they remain with us. If course, we know this. Instinctively we know this. Avoidance is our first thought, and we go with that. It keeps the peace. We feel fine. But then, the loss occurs and we are thrown by it. Better that we own the reality and face it. Best if we prepare for the shock before it is needed while it reminds us to value all who surround us. This is so simple; very simple. And yet the lesson to be learned remains unfinished. The positive new year promises new beginnings, new experiences, growth and improvements. We take this for g...

Making sense of personal loss – that is the loss of a significant person in your life – is a process of acceptance. That is not an “oh, well” but rather a recognition of the reality of the loss and accommodating it in your life. The person meant much to me; the loss created an empty space I encountered repeatedly. Each time posed difficulty, but over time each instance echoed less fiercely. So, this is a process of lessening, of impact. Two and a half years ago I lost my life partner, Rocky. That has been a huge emptiness. Then this year, my ex-wife lost her husband of 30 years in March, followed by her death in October. Both were sudden, unexpected. Two more empty spaces in my life. The toll increases. Each family member experiences these losses in their own way. My experience is that grieving the loss lasts the rest of their lifetimes, as with me. Each day brings a memory complete with attendance emotions. Those include glee, laughter, sadness and weeping. The only comfort is the...

This time of year sparks many memories. The day after Christmas was special in its own way. The stores were open, and gifts that didn’t quite fit the right mood became potential trades and returns. In our case, I remember son John and I comparing sweaters received. I was big in them back then, he wasn’t, so I agreed to swap his for cash and we went shopping! The post-holiday sales were amazing. Many sweaters were half-price. I had a field day and scored some of my best sweaters in more than two years. On the other hand, John had cash to spend on just what he wanted. We were both thrilled. In spite of the giver’s intent, we were happier with other choices. Of course, that is a distortion of what the holiday is all about, but that was not at all in our thoughts! Other memories involved things received versus weather appropriate. So many times, I had sidewalks and driveway to shovel. And shovel again. Winter sports paraphernalia would have matched the weather, but not garden tools a...

Well, huh! It’s that time of year again. Again? Yep! Sure is. The mind does its annual journey through the past. Remember when? Oh yes, I remember that! At each age, especially during the early ones, memories flood the mind. My early days were in California – Pasadena, Altadena, Inyokern (Mojave Desert), Glendora. Each community had its own identity to elders, but to the kids, it was where the fireplace was, the big window in the living room where Santa was sure to enter, or the huge pine tree in the front yard, the tree that Santa would use to identify our home among all the others. Or the desert landscape that discouraged sleighs, reindeer or not. And then, we moved to New England (Pittsfield, Massachusetts) where snow was everywhere, and we had a fireplace for Santa, plus all the other New Englandy things that simply spelled Christmas. After that, it was central New York with even more snow and very different expectations as college loomed then passed. Illinois presented the s...

A thin strip of green, waving in a slight breeze. Near the ground where worms and tiny bugs crawl. It grows with thousands of other tiny green strips, all in the same, small plot of ground. You and I call this grass or lawn. It grows wild with glee in many places, but where we want it specifically, it grows with much nurture, labor and sweat. Many times, it fails to grow at all in spite our constant feeding, seeding and toil. This is the story of American homeowners struggling to present a neat and tidy home plot complete with a healthy lawn. I remember dealing with a balky yard many years ago. Several large swatches of intended lawn were bare. I remembered a bag of lawn seed in the garage, and I freely spread a lot of seed on several bare patches. It was late fall. Of course nothing happened. Then the winter of 1978/79 happened. 93 inches of snow with months of four-foot packs of snow just sitting there on the ground. I remember six-foot high piles of snow along both sides of the ...

Odometer Miles : how far your car has traveled in its lifetime is a data point often quoted. In my case, most of my cars have traveled less than 100,000 miles when I traded them in for another vehicle. Four cars were over 100,000 miles when I sold them. Most of those worked well before selling them. I became used to their high mileage and drove them far in spite of the numbers. I drove an 87 Mustang GT to and from Arizona a few times with 120,000 miles on its odometer. One Prius had 104,000 miles pm it when it finally died. On the road. Two tows later, I traded for another Prius, this one with 140,000 miles on it. That car was excellent in every way. It looked new inside and out. It performed admirably. But this time, at my age of 82, I felt 140,000 miles was too high for reliable long road trips. Before I die, I want to visit New Mexico and Arizona again. I want to visit friends and places in New England, too. And then there is the trip to Glacier National Park in Montana that I hav...

I know it is winter. This is the season of cold, ice, snow, sliding and skidding, and everything that goes with it. Getting around is more difficult. Cold air up the sleeves and down the neck is uncomfortable. Ice in shoes is bad, worse is ice down the socks. Yes. These are companions of cold winter weather. Salt and snow melt is another companion. Rock salt gets stuck in the soles of shoes, is tracked in endlessly by every other contrivance, and messes up both hard floor surfaces and carpets. Crunch and salty white deposits accompany this seasonal beauty. Driving is worrisome for the fear of skidding or sliding into another hard object. Peering through smeared and salty windshields is yet another aspect of winter driving. Cleaning windshields at low temperatures risks freezing windshield washer fluid. That makes seeing even more difficult. Dirty cars are not dangerous per se, but the dirt often wipes off on clothing and gloves. It is unsightly and unnerving. Especially for neatnik...

I searched for a florist shop. All I got on the internet were internet florists. Finally, I searched for florists in my and nearby towns. That got some action but lo and behold, every town but two had no florists at all. The ones I remember have all closed. Disappeared. I asked friends for suggestions, and they told me about one shop in a neighboring village that still had an active florist shop. I visited it. With snow piled everywhere, finding a parking spot and the front door was a challenge. Also, I walk with a rollator walker and/or cane. The walks were too narrow for me to use the walker, so I stumbled my way on a path I hoped would lead to a door. I did. I found the door, up three steps and down a long-covered porch. Once inside I found a shop empty of people but beautifully decorated for the season. My entry made noises and soon a clerk appeared. She helped me with my purchase, and we concluded with electronic payment. All was well. We discussed shopping in today’s Americ...

This is about the weather. I’ve paid attention to this fact of life for decades. I’ve watched the gloom, cold and ice and pondered the how, why and when. I even tracked weather data at our home for several years, you know, how many inches of rain fell on what date, the depth of snowfalls, temperatures, that sort of thing. I had a little book in which I recorded all of this. The family, of course, thought I was nuts. But then, that’s normal. They scoffed at my recording every gallon of gas I bought at what mileage and on what date. They thought that was nutty as well. That record helped me track oil changes and other repairs. Mechanics used that information to determine if I had a specific problem or not. I must admit this recordkeeping became quite tedious. After 45 years, I dropped the auto data and severed my weather data collection from my life after only six or seven years. At the time of my weather data, I was commuting four hours a day involving walking 5 miles per day roundt...

Economic shifts are the wobbles to which I refer. YouTube videos are common with details explaining how various industries are declining. For example, grocery stores are reported to be in decline. However, with a growing population more groceries will be sold than ever before. The kind of products and where they are bought and sold may change, but the overall sales will continue to grow. That’s the way it is. Some grocery chains have invested heavily in low-income areas and now find that operating costs place that investment in danger. So, they build other stores and close a few. This is not a collapse of the industry. It is only an internal operating adjustment. For the shoppers at a particular store, the change feels very different, of course. Still, the industry is doing fine, Same with restaurant chains. Some chains have made some bad decisions, and they waited too long to correct them. Red Lobster is such a chain; they lost money on some promotions and now have a huge prob...

National Upset : I think it is easy to say that Americans are upset with the Trump regime. It is marked by an all-out war on immigration, the very heart and soul of what built our nation and what continues to provide population growth and vitality. Simply put, immigration defines us. Denigrating any segment of the immigrant population demeans all of us. Then there is the war against drug trafficking. I say war because the military is told to eliminate small boats plying the Pacific and Caribbean oceans. Small boats with 8 to 15 crew. Boxes of drugs, not enormous shipments. Military missiles targeting small boats. Killing crew members outright and then revisiting them to be certain all are dead. Horrific actions pitting an international military force against a police matter. Do it right or not at all. There are other means to defeat the drug cartels. No shortcuts allowed. Full due process, please. Then we can speak of a war against public education. All these mentions of war. Why s...

For years I arose at 3:30 am. I drove to Dennys and read the paper and drank coffee. Several of us did this for years, getting to know each other very well. About 5:45 I drove to the sports center for my daily workout. Then shower there, then home to dress for work. Then I was off to the office where I put in at least 9 hours, often lengthening the day with hosting a dinner meeting with clients. Long days. Back then I invented my donut day. That’s a day where I kept the above schedule, but if I was up to date with work, and had a dinner meeting, I took time off during the day for lunch and a nap. Then back to work and traveling 30 to 60 miles for the dinner meeting. This schedule held for the week unless I had a client planning session scheduled for the weekend. With planning weekends, I drove several hundred miles to the client’s conference site, set up the planning room, took a nap, then met with the client group for an evening session with dinner. Saturday was an all-day affair....

I heard a story Thanksgiving Day. It related to an elder sobbing about things in the past and the missed tomorrows. Age provides backdrop to much. All to think upon. One that affects me the most is how the current news portends a loss of what we valued most in the past. Some of that past is nearby. We hoped for much, worked hard for it to come to pass, but as we gaze on current events, we realize how far off our thinking has been compared with so many others. Democracy allows much good to happen. But it often blocks good things, too. There are those who simply don’t get it. They think individual human beings should be in total control of our society. They don’t trust government. Yet they do. Of course they do. They expect the police to come when called. They rely on fire departments to save their lives when fire threatens their very homes. And yes, fire departments save more lives via EMT services than fighting fires directly. Just think about that. Emergency medical services and ambul...

Yes, it is the season of carols, noels, decorations and shopping. Lots of shopping. The Christmas season is here and the seasonal colorful lights and displays prove it. Hints of its approach preceded Halloween as it almost always does. And then, with Thanksgiving, it arrives. Most families look forward to this time of year. Many families do not. Many reasons explain this dichotomy, but division is not just due to differing religious practices. No, some families simply cannot afford to join the shopping frenzy. Others find it difficult to even know what to buy for someone else. Goods and services simply are not appropriate for many people. With age especially, recipients need very few things. Services, yes, and kind thoughts mostly. Yes, shopping is fraught with undefined mysteries. Gathering is a primary thrust. Not everyone in the grouping is loved and welcome, but we hide these issues and make a good try and being glad and happy to see everyone. Family politics is more complica...