Tossing Stuff

Room in a closet soon is filled. Same with a box in the basement. A corner of the garage gets some company with things no longer in use. Somehow, we think there is future value in the things, so we keep them rather than disposing of them.

Disposing of anything requires a decision. A decision we are not ready to make. The easy way out is to stuff it somewhere, out of sight. That works very well. Has for many years.

Until the time comes when we either move to a new home, or simply run out of space. We need to downsize our possessions. The new home has one or two fewer rooms, fewer closets. Maybe even no basement! Or even a garage. Oh, Lord. Where do we put all this stuff?

So, a decision is forced on us to make. Do we save some of this unused stuff? Or do we give it away to someone. The kids have said many times, no, they don’t need or want it. Same with neighbors and friends. They all have their own closets filled with, you got it, stuff.

So, Goodwill, St. Vincent DePaul and Salvation Army are the recipients of a lot of our stuff. When they finally say enough, we are forced to see the garbage can as the final recipient. At last, that destination seems to work.

Yes, our things still have value. Someone can make use of it. Inherently we know the things have more life in them, but not for us. We must shed them. We must clean out the closets and basements of our lives. And yes, that includes the attics.

When a loved one dies, all their stuff has no use to you. It retains sentimental value, and the value of use by others. I was lucky. Two neighbor women came to my rescue and sorted all of Rocky’s clothing. What to toss outright, what to give to family, and what to give to local charities. While I was out doing something else, they did the clearing out. When I arrived home, I had new closet and drawer space. Like magic, this was accomplished.

Remaining are the computers, tools, and things of Rocky’s life. His boys have come and cleared out anything they wanted. The rest is for me to do something with. All these months later, I still have winter coats, sweaters and hoodies, and countless bits and pieces of other things and hobbies. Clearly, no one wants any of this. And I have no need for them.

The decision is the dumpster. It must be. But because Rocky touched these things, it seems a sin to just toss them.  I’m sure you know what I mean. Somehow these things take on a value or sacredness that makes parting with them so difficult.

Today, the winter coats went, along with some old sweaters and hoodies. Some of the paperwork and tools went as well.

I’ll live with this status for a bit and then screw up the courage to toss a few more things. I’m not certain this counts as grieving, but for an old poop like me, maybe it is. Maybe it is. Just maybe.

March 29, 2024

 

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