Growing Old, Becoming Aware

In recent months I have blogged less frequently and focused more on personal developments than public issues. That is because our household is dealing with problems of aging. Think back on your own life, do you recall anyone teaching you what to expect when you age? I’m talking of those years of 60 and above.

Today, my spouse and life partner, Rocky, is 78 and a survivor of two cancers in recent years, but is now battling two new cancers that will take him. We have arranged hospice in the home and have a wonderful service of professionals who truly know what they are doing. We have caregivers as well provided by the county. We receive Meals on Wheels and have additional mealtime help from friends, family and our great church members.

In short, the battle is ours but we are not waging it alone. A large supporting cast is ever present. And so much appreciated!

Last evening, Rocky woke me from a nap to tell me his blood sugar was low and non-responsive to meds and glucose pills. He asked that I call the paramedics for help. I did, they came and they labored with us to solve the immediate problem. Diabetes is not a medical condition creating the hospice, but it is a complicating medical condition along with 3 or 4 others that makes the cancer a more potent foe.

I also called the hospice emergency number and they even discussed the situation with the paramedic team. We came to an agreement that glucose treatments – a tube of it and also an IV infusion – would be involved but no decision would be made to transport Rocky to the hospital. That trip would complicate the hospice role. The immediate issue was stability, not cure.

The hospice nurse arrived within the hour to sit with us and discuss the issue more. By that time stability had returned but low sugars continued and blood pressure readings were highly variable, mostly on the low side.

We weathered the night with several trips to the bathroom. All done by wheelchair and at 2-hour intervals.

The bottom line is this: we were told that what Rocky is experiencing is the active process of dying. The final moments may be days, weeks or months ahead, but the prognosis of 3 to 5 months is still appropriate. Last night we were made aware that sooner is more likely, caused by a compendium of medical conditions that reduce normal functions of the body. It is the story of cancer.

It is also the story of aging. Rocky has lived longer than his mother (72) and his brother (68). His age of 78 is a worthy accomplishment. More are not likely. Wrapping our heads around this is the immediate task. It is not easy nor pleasant. It just is. A fact of life.

And that fact is not in any textbook or lesson I encountered in my 80 years. Just experience. Always experience.

April 18, 2023   

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