Do Unto Others

I hope others respect me enough to treat me as they would like to be treated. That means, if you don’t agree with me, just let the disagreement be. Don’t fight it with insulting language or shunning, or nastiness. Just let it be something you disagree with. The other person is not harming you with his/her opinion/belief. It just is.

I like a good discussion on topics that matter. It is good exercise for the brain. But it is also exercise in restraint of feelings. Disagreement should not mean anger, frustration, revenge or any other emotion that could lead to regrettable behavior, action. A good discussion peels away the logic of an opinion so you can understand what the other person means by their position, and helps you understand how they came to believe as they do. Who knows, it may change your mind on the topic. At least it should help you accept that person’s effort to understand the issue.

You may also learn how to discuss the topic in a way that might change someone’s opinion, but that is not the purpose of the discussion. The point of the discussion is to learn something about the other person and how it relates to the topic under discussion.

A debate is not a discussion. It is a competition tp out-talk and defeat the other person. It is not constructive. It is destructive. It most often devolves into emotions that lead to violence. It hardens the combatants. It does not illuminate them or the topic under discussion.

Don’t agree with me? Thank me for sharing my opinion, and let it be. Step away and focus on something else. Perhaps another person, a joke, a pleasant thought, or a pleasant diversion. It is not your job to right the wrongs in the world or change everyone’s mind on each and every topic.

Nor can you change every driver on the road to the perfect model you support. I am still working on this one!

July 6, 2022

 

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