Absorbing the Whole

One person. Alone. Sitting at a desk, computer, book, or behind the wheel of a car. Pause for breath. Pause for a stoplight to change. Pause to think. Time to absorb what surrounds. Putting things together to understand meaning.

Yes, alone we face the world. Always have. We lean on others, hope for their presence, and mention our questions and doubts. The interchange is delicate. What do you think of this, or that, or whatever? Does this help me build my own thoughts on the subject, and lead to conclusions and understandings?

Yes. And no. It takes bits of these interactions to accumulate into general meaning. Using those conclusions is yet another matter. Building actions on fleeting understanding is a dare. But we do it. Inch by inch we move toward another point of equilibrium, a dot of balance. Perilous this is, but moments chance the nature of the balance, and we are off to consider yet other applications of logic.

When I think of America, I think of our history of creation. The United States was not an automatic formation. It was a result of arguing, discussion, logic, emotional outrage, and so much more. People took sides. Which idea was better than the other? How many ideas were in the competition in the first place? What is the ideal we could aim for? What are we doing here? How do we go about it? What rules are we following? And who the hell wrote those rules?

Sides to a discussion does not mean two; many sides were proffered. Power was a consideration. Who was included in these discussions was another consideration, and the basis of the power struggle? Who owned land? Who owned slaves? Who was partial or outright loyal to the English Crown? Who were willing supporters of independence and freedom from the Crown?

What was a colony versus a nation? Or a region versus a ‘state?’ What was a state? Who governed in such constructs? How were those governors selected? What specific rights did the state have versus citizen rights? Were all citizens equal?

Today we know more of those answers. Today, we have an imperfect union struggling with the same issues – equality, freedom, liberty, individualism, frame of mind, wealth or lack of same, power or powerless, landed or not, and so on. Yes, we argue these points in 2022 even though in 1775 discussions were deep, broad and heated.

We think these are settled. They are not.

Today we bad mouth people who are different from ourselves just like they did in frontier times. Just like they did in Philadelphia as leaders struggled to define this new nation and its system of governance. Those days had powdered wigs, fancy dress and polite manners. Still, the nasty was prevalent in the room, outside the room, and in the boarding houses and woods that surrounded the city.

Later the seat of government changed again and again and finally landed in Washington, DC. A hot, humid, swampy, muddy place. Streets planned but not yet built. Buildings planned, some being erected, temporary housing thrown up in open spaces before neighborhoods were present. The temporary was the seed of permanence. Yet arguments defined lack of agreement.

Today is the same. Rules are changed. Power is wrestled in back rooms. Money is maneuvered. Reputations are torn apart, built up yet warped again and again to push forward hot-headed agreements.

Even in Lincoln’s time, especially in Lincoln’s time of peril and civil war, nasty behavior inside and out of the halls of government prevailed. How anything got done is a miracle. How the war was waged and won is a marvel. And everywhere disagreement and backstabbing.

This was and is our nation. Knowing its workings does not help. Coming to know these things helps explain the stagnancy of today. Not pretty.

I think there are no permanent answers. To anything. Manners aside, justice counts for little.

May 17, 2022

 

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